1. Don't reimplement S_ISDIR() and S_ISREG() badly.
2. Don't reimplement access() badly.

This code appears to have been copied from ancient versions of the
corresponding backend routines, and not patched to incorporate subsequent
fixes (see my commits of 2008-03-31 and 2010-01-14 respectively).
It might be a good idea to change it to just *call* those routines,
but for now I'll just transpose these fixes over.